IT'S HALF PAST ON MY LIFE

Death brings about strange revelations.

I learnt that I had a chance to go diving and go collecting water samples in the Great Barrier Reefs... actually! My mum told me that they could have given me the education that I had wanted.

But I mistook their word years back when they say that they couldn't afford a degree in Australia. To further add to my misery, I went about the last 5 years, getting a scholarship and working in the kitchens... to ease my parent's burden when there is not much of a burden to ease.

I am quite angry at myself for not getting my messages loud and clear. From my side and from theirs. I can't stand to think what might have turned out... I wouldn't have met someone and caused so much pain. I wouldn't have such a narrrow outlook in life that I have now. I wouldn't have to realise that I am actually not dumb.

This life had led me here and deserted me, and I need to find my way back to the wide, embracing Oceans. Only one thing, I cannot find my fins... can it be done without? A wonderful revelation to ponder about on my broken spring cabin bed, surrounded by the one thing that could have made my life beautiful - the Waters.

Irony is beautiful...